Rosie's Cancer Journey

I think it is finally safe to say that I am halfway through chemo. I have 3 rounds down, 3 more to go. I still have chemo every three weeks. My next one is on January 5.

This round hit me last Friday afternoon. By Saturday, I felt like I had the flu again. It lasted through this morning, and then I started to feel better and improved quickly. There are still a few lingering symptoms, a touch of nausea here and there. But if it goes like before, I should be good now until the next round!

When it starts to hit, I tend to not respond to messages or calls. I really do not feel well and have found that in order to get through, I need to shut out everything else. There isn’t much that can be done except for to get through it. I feel kinda bad about the silence, but this is a lesson in self care that I’m practicing. One of many.

I spent the sick days literally sitting there doing nothing at times because I couldn’t even focus on a TV show or an audiobook. When I could focus on something short, I scrolled Insta, watched rubbish (I’m a few seasons behind on “90 Day Fiance”), and saw some bad movies (“Oh. What. Fun.” is the one that comes to mind… Why don’t they have phones? Or know how to look up a credit card charge?) I made the mistake of watching “The Family Stone”. It’s a solid holiday rom-com, but maybe not the best choice for me right now given one of the characters’ stories, IYKYK.

And now, the holidays and the main holiday that our family celebrates, Christmas, is upon us. Although we (my husband and I) haven’t been in the best of spirits, we are really trying. Every single day. That’s all we have. I know that I have to remind myself of this all day long, especially when I’m sick. It can be depressing and sad.

I tend to interact with a lot of positive content on my Instagram feed, and this is one of the sayings that came up for me yesterday that I shared to my story. A lesson in gratefulness, even in the most difficult time. It’s really true! I’m so glad I haven’t forgotten this yet. If I ever do, send help!

And when I do start to feel better, like now, I start to make plans again. I work outside. I work inside. I am slower and my stamina is definitely not where it was before, but I have a lot to do. I socialize and visit! I try to do all of the things to fill up my soul and get ready for the next time.

Happy Christmas. ❤️